Blown Fuse

A Quizzle

I get paid once per month, and seeing as how my next payday won't come until after Christmas, I'm starting my shopping now.

Kids are easy to shop for. I'll just go into Toys-R-Us and get whatever's cute and battery-operated. Perhaps I'll buy them all books (and they
d better be grateful, damnit!)

Adults are a bit more problematic to shop for. I know my grandma likes things that smell good, so that's easy enough. My mom likes things that make her look like she earns more than what she actually does. I'll get her a TJ Maxx gift card.

But what about the rest of 'em? I like the gifts I give to be somewhat thoughtful, so I won't just buy anything.

What are some some gifts you ended up giving after much deliberation and shopping?

And bend! And Stretch!

This is nothing new - it has lived in the office since Bossman officially moved down here (June or July of last year). They had two full trailers of furniture and household goods and that was only half of what they had in their New Jersey home. For whatever reason, instead of having the exercise machine and his gun safe delivered to his new townhouse, it graces the front of my desk.

The safe I don't mind so much because it shields me from the stares and glares of my coworkers. The elliptical machine, however, is just plain tacky in plain sight.

Bossman has tried selling it to us (for too much) and has even told me that if I wanted it I could take it for free (I don't have anywhere to put it).

There are a couple of folks in the office who want it, but unless they can talk him down to the same cheap price he offered me it'll sit there collecting our dust.

On God and Ignorance

I couldn't sleep last night. Every now and then my mind starts wandering right as I try to drop off. I've always been a super-analytical thinker who second-guesses everything (that makes taking multiple-choice tests very difficult). I've had doubts abought the existence of a God since I was 10. At around 3:30 I was able to get to sleep. I read some from a novel to take my mind off of morbid thoughts however in the back of mind I knew that it was merely a curtain covering up heavier things.

That's what keeps me up at night. Thinking that I'm going to die and that's it. It seems like such a waste for us to be so evolved and for our consciousness to just fade away. I want to believe there's something bigger that is responsible for all that lies before us - that is why I consider myself agnostic and not an athiest.

I should mention that I was fully tempted to close commenting on this entry to prevent anyone from shoving unwanted religious advances at me, however I'm curious to know if anyone else feels the way and how they cope with it. I find it hard to fathom that one day I'll close my eyes and the lights will just go out.

I'm stalling.

We're home. We'll, we've been home for about 12 hours now, but anyow. My in-laws will be here any minute and here I sit in fuzzy slippers and my bathrobe blogging.

Actually, what I'm doing is discretely rearranging my personal effects to hide anything resembling a bill, bank statement, or article of possession I have no desire to discuss.

They're bringing the dog-in-law. This should be an interesting experience for Bodie. Puffy Savage is still locked up in the guest room (shit...am I going to need to evacuate her?) and Bodie is only tolerating her mildly. A good portion of the time she's attempting to swat Puffy with her little kitty thumb nail. Bodie will tear that damn dog apart...and he'll probably piss on the floor.

Only a handful of you have ever been inside my house, and when you were here it was probably in worse shape than it is right now in terms of getting the house presentable. Now it just smells like cat and looks as if there are toddlers about throwing every damn thing on top of each flat surface in sight....and so I sit blogging, instead of doing a quick clean-up.

Shows where my priorities are.

A wee blog post before Thanksgiving.

I've been rather lazy and boring lately so I haven't had much to bother you with. We're about to embark on the over the river and through the woods journey to Grandma's.

I'm supposed to meet up with my haven't-seen-in-five-years cousin later today. If I get into any trouble, I'll cellphone blog the pictures.

Gobble gobble!

The hangover aura lifts

I must have drank at least an entire bottle of wine last night. Thanks be to the Gods that I am a graceful drunk and know when to draw the line. My barometer is that if I can walk to the bathroom without swaying or walking forehead-first into a doorframe, I'm doing dyn-o-mite. According to my boss, I turn "nice" when I'm boozed up and I should have a shot of something before work each other. *whatever*

Anyhow, before I put some food in my stomach other than Snickers bar bites, I need to show off my new baby: the food processor (didn't realize I was taking a picture of the spanish side). I bought it on a whim when I was in Target shopping for party goods. I always knew I wanted, no - needed one, so here it is.

Now I have to figure out what the hell to do with it.

I slept through my vet appointment.

Uuuuuuuughhhghhhh that seventh glass of wine last night was probably a poor choice.

Oh well, at least I don't have any light sensitivity. I really was afraid that I would go to sleep and wake up drunk.

@$!&*$@!! Oven!

I'm through. That fucking oven has got to go. Okay, let me back up for a second. Every time in the past two years when I've tried to bake something, I've had to hold my breath and hope for the best.

My cookies don't spread. My pies take so long to bake in the middle that they burn on the bottoms. My brownies are inedible.

I'm a damn good cook, so this is pissing me off.

I paid a good chunk of change today to make premium brownie's for my coworker's kid's bake sale and out of two pans, I was able to get out 4 edible chunks.

*cries*

Aww :)

This is from my Yahoo! home page:

Little things make me happy.

*relaxing yoga breath*

I need to go to Wal-Mart.

*inhales and exhales heavily*

I was at Target getting some stuff for a cocktail party we're going to tomorrow and I didn't get any portable pyrex food thingies.....I thought to myself that perhaps I should go to Pier 1 and get something funky...but, no.

Shit. Pray for me.

Hold it - hold it - - now!

Isn't there a sort of "deadline" on how long a person has to cash a check? I've been wondering, because a $5 check I wrote almost five months ago just got cashed this week.

Can you imagine how that $5 threw me off whenever I looked at my bank statement online?

In case you're wondering, it was a check I wrote to get a sample issue of a literary magazine I may send stuff to.

Damn, that's scary.

I made the mistake of checking my cell phone messages when I got up. The guy whose desk is right behind mine at work left this message - hope you can open it.

I don't know how much bandwidth the site I have that hosted on has, so save and then listen, please. Turn your volume down - he's pretty loud for 7:29 in the morning.

"Happy Birthday, T-Love".

Closer and closer to middle-age.

Oh...kay. So, I'm home on my birhday. What now? My...

hold on, coffee.

Back. Like I was saying, my ulterior motive behind staying home today wasn't just that I had a whole bunch of vacation days to unload before the end of the year, but that I didn't want my boss planning some awkward lunch thing. I remember when it was divulged a couple of weeks ago that my birthdate was coming up. People started grabbing calendars and pencilling things in. That makes me uncomfortable for some reason - especially in knowing that one of those people carriers party streamers around like its no big deal - not in the mood.

If Bossman had taken me out to luch, he'd had to have taken everyone, and given my bitching and hissing about certain lazy officemates of of late, I didn't want them latching on for a free lunch.

Coffee's done. Be back.

I guess I'll get some laundry done today...the pile is starting to smell. I told a coworker I would make some brownies for her daughter's cotillion bake sale (stop making that face, Scott - I'll ave you a damn brownie). I need to put some gas in the Jeep...do a little vehicle rearrangement in the driveway. I've got band practice at 7:30 ish.

Sounds like a good time.

BAppy Hirthday to meee...

It's T minus 5.5 hours till my birthdate...I'm starting the party a few thousand seconds early. Please excuse the cat butt in the picture.

Gratuitous Kitty Shots

I couldn't resist.

Here's Puffy Savage (she has a bit of a kitty cold):

And here's Bodie (she's on a diet):

Such a happy furry family.

Be a big girl.

One of my little-known pet peeves is when people add "to me" to the end of their sentences. Women are especially notorious for this. We are psychologically wired to require validatation for everything that comes out of our mouths. This is why when we raise our hands in class, our answers sound like questions.

"1492?"

So, when someone says "He's hilarious, to me" or something like it, I get annoyed. It's like saying, "Well, this is my opinion, but I'm sure yours is more important."

Stop it.

Ole Meanie

Cat people, I need some help. Bodie is being a absolute beeeyotch about the new kitten. She's even attacking me for smelling like her. I doused her with half a bottle of water some minutes ago for trying to attack me, and even soaking wet she's sitting here stalking the bedroom door where I have Puff locked in.

I've read so many different opinions on the internet about how to introduce two cats. Those of you who've been through it (successfully), what did you do?

I'm so pissed off at Bodie that I dumped the food in her bowl in the trash...oh, and she cares, the fat-ass.

Ow

You know that shaky vibrating you get in your arms after you've been holding a jackhammer or week-whacker for a good while?

Pilates will do that to you, too.

No shit.

I have two pilates instructors: the one that teaches the Monday evening class, and the one that teaches the Saturday class. I've gotten used to their varying teaching methods and have been okay at switching back and forth between methods.

Tonight a sub got called in. A sub that normally teaches the sculpting classes. I have a weird feeling that I'm going to wake up tomorrow and not be able to straighten my legs.

It's a girl!

Her name is Puffy Savage - Puff for short.

Her big sister is not amused and is spending a great deal of time hissing at the guest room door where I have her sequestered.

She's 12 weeks old and spunky as heck. She's grey like Bodie and still has a big kitten head.

People piss me off.

But that's not news to you, eh?

Okay, remember our shitty vacation? Well, besides the fact that it was was a weather-induced waste of money, we still haven't gotten back our security deposit.

Our rental agreement said that we would recieve our security deposit back within 45 days of departure. That came and went. It's been about 2 months.

Scott tried contacting the property owners using all the phone numbers we had, however they'd all been disconnected. Okay, that was okay - we knew they had recently moved, so we cut them some slack regarding that.

We backtraced through the website we rented the house through and had the agent locate the owners. Finally, Scott got an e-mail back from the owner saying that she was sorry for the delay but there had been a death in their family and they were late in getting security deposits out.

Okay. First, let's back up.

Don't get me wrong. I can understand how painful it is to lose someone close to you. I'm truely empathetic about the situation, BUT, you have to draw a line between your personal life and your financial transactions.

I don't like it when people make excuses for not doing what they're supposed to, especially when it involves money.

If we pay a security deposit, that money is supposed to be held in trust. That means YOU DO NOT SPEND that money. They had the benefit of 45+ days of banking interest on those funds and get to keep that. We're talking about a commodity: they had something we wanted, and we got it at an okay price. Certain terms of contract have to be followed for both sides to have a equitable trade: if you say you'll send the money back in 45 days, you have to do it.

Furthermore, you do NOT reveal to your renters your personal problems. That's none of our damned business. Merely say, "I am unable to immedately refund your money. I am working to send it out as soon as possible." If a person finds that unacceptable and demands to know specifics, tell them your story then.

Second: if we pay tax on that deposit, YOU HAVE TO REFUND THE TAX as well. You should not feel personally wronged for being asked for what was supposed to be returned to us in the first place. If you return your ill-fitting pants to the Gap for cash, do they not pay back your sales tax? Yes, they do. We probably weren't supposed to pay tax on the deposit to start with.

What I'm REALLY pissed about is their lack of understanding for the fact that we had the worst fucking vacation ever in their property. They DID NOT disclose the fact that the roof had a substantial leaking problem, which they DID KNOW. That's useful information to have before spending three days in hurricane conditions, huh? We spent three days mopping water and placing water-catching receptacles under leaks so that their fucking carpet wouldn't be ruined. We left that place IMMACULATE given the circumstances. Rule number two of business: a return customer is a profitable customer. They won't get that from us.

I feel used and I'm really pissed off about this situation. If you don't have the money, say so. We'll not be satisfied with that obviously, but trying to make us feel like bad people for bothering you during a sensitive time is way beyond unprofessional. I'm going to make damned sure nobody I know ever rents a property from them.

Perhaps I'm stark-raving mad, but if you had been 60 days behind in doing your responsibilities at work, wouldn't you be fired?

Villa 54. Bald Head Island. Stay away.

*whistles innocently*

Hee hee hee, I'm getting another cat!!!

Ho ho holy cow.

This year I'm fully commited to the idea of having a Christmas tree.

Since Scott and I have been together we've never bothered doing anything out of the way for Christmas. Most of that was because we didn't have anywhere to put a tree. Well, now that the living room is presentable and there's a big space for a tree, I've started buying ornaments.

You've all heard about the UNC Santa I bought some time back. That was my very first ornament purchase.

Well, I went into Hallmark last week for...something or other, a card I think, and came out with four Star Wars ornaments, and one "I Love Lucy" ornament for myself.

$120 for six ornaments. Hmm. I guess the rest will be tacky glass balls until next year.

Air Etiquette

Um. I'm trying to think of ways to state this delicately...

The ultimate goal of taking a yoga class (and pilates for that matter) is that you have to be sufficiently relaxed to get your body to move into certain contotrtions that your body would normally find offensive.

Occasionally, someone gets so relaxed that they...um...let a big dry one rip.

The first time I was in that situation it was in a group yoga class at the student rec center in college and it was a packed class. Some guy just got so relaxed that he subwoofered one right through his spandex shorts. The teacher said, very deadpan, "Thaaaat's right, relaxation is the ultimate goal of yoga." I had to clench my jaws together to not giggle.

I'm quite sure instructors learn to expect these, um...outbursts and stop noticing them. Well, it happened around me yesterday for the second time...and it was one of those fleshy people who look like they stink when the work out.

We were were doing seal or some pose like that and...*sigh*

I'm an adult, so I kept myself composed, but in my head, y'all, I was rolling on the floor laughing.

Is that a violin in your trunk or are you just happy to see me?

When I ordered my new flute I also orderd a Schirmer etude book - you know, to get my chops back up.

Well, they sent me the wrong book. It's Tartini: The Art of Bowing for the Violin.

I don't play violin, nor do I have any intentions of beginning to. I asked for an exchage and they told me to keep it and pass it on to a friend who can use it.

Any amateur violinists out there want it? I'll mail it to you for free.

Netfuckers.

Interesting. I bitch about our Netflix service a lot because we pay a good chunk of change for it and aren't getting the number of discs ("unlimited") we were promised. Well, looks like someone waged a class-action suit against them:

"You are receiving this notice because you were a paid Netflix member before January 15, 2005. Under a proposed class action settlement, you may be eligible to receive a free benefit from Netflix.

A class action lawsuit entitled Chavez v. Netflix, Inc. was filed in San Francisco Superior Court (case number CGC-04-434884) on September 23, 2004. The lawsuit alleges that Netflix failed to provide "unlimited" DVD rentals and "one day delivery" as promised in its marketing materials. Netflix has denied any wrongdoing or liability. The parties have reached a settlement that they believe is in the best interests of the company and its subscribers.

Netflix will provide eligible subscribers with the benefit described below, if the settlement is approved by the Court.

* Current Netflix Members: If you enrolled in a paid membership before January 15, 2005 and were a member on October 19, 2005, you are eligible to receive a free one-month upgrade in service level. For example, if you are on the 3 DVDs at-a-time program, you will be upgraded to the 4 DVDs at-a-time program for one month. There will be no price increase during the upgraded month. (If you cancel your membership after October 19, 2005 and before you receive the upgrade, you will have to rejoin to get the upgrade.)

* Former Netflix Members: If you enrolled in a paid membership before January 15, 2005 but were not a member on October 19, 2005, you are eligible to receive a free one-month Netflix membership on your choice of the 1, 2 or 3 DVDs at-a-time unlimited program. (If you rejoin after October 19, 2005 but before you receive the free one-month membership, you will receive a credit for the free month when it becomes available.)

These benefits will be provided after the Effective Date as defined in the Settlement Agreement. Your eligibility for the benefits is based on your membership status as of October 19, 2005. The full Settlement Agreement is available for review at www.netflixsettlement.com.

You have four options to respond to the proposed settlement. You have until December 28, 2005 to make your decision:

Option 1. Sign Up For The Benefit As Part Of The Settlement
To receive the benefit, you must complete the online registration process no later than February 17, 2006, at www.netflixsettlement.com. By signing up for the benefit, you waive your right to bring a separate lawsuit against Netflix concerning the Released Claims (as defined in the Settlement Agreement found at www.netflixsettlement.com).

Option 2. Do Nothing
If you do not wish to receive the benefit, do nothing. You will not receive the benefit but will remain a Class Member. You therefore waive your right to bring a separate lawsuit against Netflix concerning the Released Claims.

Option 3. Exclude Yourself From the Class
To exclude yourself from the class, you must mail a letter by December 28, 2005. By excluding yourself, you preserve your right to bring a lawsuit against Netflix concerning the Released Claims. However, you will not get the benefit described above.

Option 4. Make An Objection To The Settlement In Court
To object to the settlement, you must file legal papers in the San Francisco Superior Court by January 5, 2006.

To receive your benefit, you must register by February 17, 2006 as described above in Option 1. You will not receive any other reminders to register for the benefit. If you have registered for the benefit and your eligibility is confirmed, then you will be provided additional information by email following the Effective Date as defined in the Settlement Agreement.

After the benefit period ends, the new or upgraded level of service will continue automatically (following an email reminder) and you will be billed accordingly, unless you cancel or modify your subscription. You can cancel or modify your subscription at any time.

In addition, if the settlement is approved by the Court, Netflix will modify portions of its Terms of Use. Netflix also will refer to its Terms of Use in certain advertisements.

To get more information about the settlement and procedures, and to take options 1, 3 or 4, visit www.netflixsettlement.com."

So, we get a one-month upgrade? I think that's bullshit. They admit no wrongdoing for the fact that they don't deliver DVDs as promised, and they're allowed to continue on with their current business practices?

I suspect that our "upgrade" will merely consist of the number of movies we're supposed to have at our current level as calculated by their "one day" turnaround and normal postal service deliver.

Fuckers.

Must be pretty hard milking soy beans.

...did you know that Starbucks charges a $0.50 fee to substitute milk with soy milk?

Okay, heh. See, I didn't know that until I cleaned the weekend's trash out my wallet three seconds ago and read the receipt.

Excuse the hell out of me for being lactose intolerant...I wonder if I can get my health insurance to cover the difference....

Single-leg Circles

I've felt suspiciously like crap today. The feeling of dread and "ugh" began to descend upon me at about 10 this morning. At that point I promptly stopped working in favor of other activities - like looking at shiny things and taking frequent outside-for-air breaks. I felt like at any moment I was going to keel over and fall asleep on my knees. Feeling better now, but I can't shake the feeling of "Arkgh!" in my esophogus.

I spent several hours over the weekend searching the internet for a gym or health club. What I really wanted was someplace where I could take yoga and pilates classes without having too many dilletantes in there taking up space and staring at me.

I narrowed my choices down to the new Y built down in the Tobacco Warehouse District downtown which offers mat classes and a full-fledged pilates studio near the mall.

I left work early yesterday afternoon with the intentions of scoping out both locations. Scott works near the Y, so I figured I'd make that stop last on my way home to say "Hi." Well, I didn't make it to the Y. I was so impressed with the atmosphere of the pilates studio that I went ahead and dropped the bucks on a block of mat classes.

The studio is a little under two years old and has modern decor and a quiet atmosphere. I took a mat class yesterday not knowing how many people would show up. You see, one of my biggest personality problems is that I don't like doing things by myself. That comes from spending at least part of my life having best friends that live in close proximity to me. Now my best friend lives in Winston-Salem and all my family is 3 or more hours away.

Up until recently I wouldn't even go to Wal*Mart by myself. I had such severe anxiety that I would be eaten up in the crowds. I had the same problem in college after I severed ties with people I had been associating with. I didn't even want to go to class for fear that people would look at me.

Let me tell you - answering phones all day and bossing people around gets you over that real damn fast.

But, I digress. I went to a class by myself expecting there to be a group of 8. There were only 2 for my first class (which normally is a $35 service), so I got individual attention for the price of a group class...but, I went. I didn't punk out.

Small victories, folks. Next thing you know I'll be willing to go to the movies during weekends!