Lookie Loos

I'm normally very careful about stepping outside the house on Saturdays and Sundays to get the mail or newspaper. Quite often, I haven't washed my face and the chances are good that my clothes don't match.

I look both ways for neighbors and people walking their dogs.

I was careless this morning. The landscaper who works across the street was outside. Normally the homeowner is outside supervising the crew so they'll basically leave you alone, but occassionally they'll try to step outside their bounds to sell you their service or whatever else you're not in the mood to hear.

I'm so snot-congested and cranky that I'm not in the friendly "I'm glad you're here beautifying our neighborhood" mood. So, when I step out to get my paper, avert your eyes and keep on clipping those hedges. Don't start calling out "Hey. Miss. Excuse me. Hey, Sweetheart?" as if I have something to say to you or else you have anything worth telling me. You may think I'm a snob, but dude...back off, or I'll sic the cat on you.